 |
| "Start small...smaller...even smaller....Start by stopping" Jude Spacks '17 |
My neighbor the rapid Buddhist was already whizzing away after our chat, when she turned back with one more thing. "I'd like to start writing again--but I never seem to get to it. Could you tell me what to do?"
I adjusted an imaginary coach hat on my head and responded, "How 'bout this? For a few days in a row, write for just 10 minutes and then stop."
She scooted back towards me, shaking her head. "Oh, no, no, no. I have to write at least a page...that's what I used to do. It takes way longer than 10 minutes."
"Ok, but I hear you haven't been getting to write that page lately. Why not try 10 minutes, or, say, 3 sentences--whatever seems like a very easy amount--then stop? Later you can do more--you'll want to. But warm up first by practicing ease and stopping. That's a good place to start."
I imagined other ways she could play with interrupting the habit of Not-Writing to help shift her can't-get-to-it pattern. Even by mentioning it, she could already be renewing awareness of her lucky freedom to write or not. I didn't say this out loud--she was in a hurry.
She called back cheerily over her shoulder, "I can always use practice stopping!" as she hustled away. (When I next saw her, she said she'd begun writing her page-a-day again).
Most of us can use practice stopping, especially when there's resistance to starting something creative. Even the thought of the possibility of pausing may unravel the rope in a mental tug-of-war.
What might you want to stop, as an experiment?
Maybe:
I adjusted an imaginary coach hat on my head and responded, "How 'bout this? For a few days in a row, write for just 10 minutes and then stop."
She scooted back towards me, shaking her head. "Oh, no, no, no. I have to write at least a page...that's what I used to do. It takes way longer than 10 minutes."
"Ok, but I hear you haven't been getting to write that page lately. Why not try 10 minutes, or, say, 3 sentences--whatever seems like a very easy amount--then stop? Later you can do more--you'll want to. But warm up first by practicing ease and stopping. That's a good place to start."
I imagined other ways she could play with interrupting the habit of Not-Writing to help shift her can't-get-to-it pattern. Even by mentioning it, she could already be renewing awareness of her lucky freedom to write or not. I didn't say this out loud--she was in a hurry.
She called back cheerily over her shoulder, "I can always use practice stopping!" as she hustled away. (When I next saw her, she said she'd begun writing her page-a-day again).
What might you want to stop, as an experiment?
Maybe:
- Stop pushing to prove or fix anything about you and your worthiness.
- Stop overlooking that you're already essentially ok, whether you do the thing or not.
- Stop trying to strong-arm or cajole or rush yourself. Stop trying to force solutions.
- Stop insisting you must know what you don't know (yet). Look with curiosity towards Don't Know. Curiosity creates.
